Runaway Ed's
by sikeokilla
Summary: Set in an alternate universe in which the Eds weren't raised in peach creek and the Kankers aren't trailer park sisters. Watch as the story unfolds.
1. Chapter 1

This is an alternate universe story centered around the idea that the Eds aren't actually from peach creek. In this story the teenaged Eds each seek to escape their troubled pasts and find refuge in an abandoned old house in a tidy little neighborhood. Enjoy!

* * *

Two years. It had been two whole years since Edd started running. Even if it wasn't the easiest thing to do he knew that it was the most reasonable. Outside of the rickety red box car light zipped by in a blur of color. The sock hat wearing teen clutched at the ant jars he held so dear as he wondered when the train would finally dock with the station. In the corner opposite Edd lay a large mass of flesh and blood. The stinking thing was covered by little more than a trench coat and it's face was mangled up in a nearby broken bottle.

"Served him right for trying to charge me for a ride." Edd muttered to nobody in particular. "I have just as much right as anyone else. Maybe more of a right?"

Edd felt the train lurch through another turn and checked the blood covered pocket watch he'd earned only an hour before. 'If my calculations are correct,' Eddward thought as he stood and moved to the opening of the box car. 'I need to exit...NOW!'

Edd leaped from the train smiling as his perfect calculations flew him towards a body of water. Minutes later Edd drug himself up onto the shore of the small river. He had tried to find a place to hunker down that was so far out of the way that they'd never find him. He stared up at the billboard and smirked in the knowledge that he'd found it. The billboard had writing in bold letters that clearly stated 'Welcome to Peach Creek.'

* * *

Ed's father had been an "all purpose mechanic". His mother stayed home to take care of him and his little sister. When he wasn't reading comics or watching horror films he was either playing with his little sister or learning how to be a handyman like his dad. By the time Ed was ten he knew more about horror movies and cars than most mechanics and movie critics learn in a lifetime. When Ed turned thirteen he and his sister decided to celebrate by playing at the old railroad crossing creek. The afternoon had gone so brilliantly and Ed was so busy packing their stuff up to go home that he never saw Sarah fall. As fate would have it Ed turned around just in time to be horribly scarred with the image of his baby sister being turned into road kill by a train. A stray limb flying out to land on his shoe.

After that his father cracked and his mom stopped caring, about anything. They walked around the house like zombies completely ignoring their bills, their needs, and even their own son. It got so bad that finally they were reduced to stumbling around in an alley.

Ed, mentally broken by what he'd seen retreated into his horror games and became obsessed with roleplaying a member of the living dead. One day his obsession got out of control and he took up a characters personality completely replacing his own. When the large oaf grew to the age of fifteen he suddenly seemed to drift from the false reality he had created around himself and instead adopted a goofy grin and stopped thinking about things so hard. He waltzed his way to a place that his dad used to say they'd live someday after they made enough money to move out of the smog ridden city's cramped apartment complex. The subdivision had beautiful houses up and down block after block but only one looked just abandoned enough to be safe in. Ed Took refuge in the large musty house and quickly got to work making the place slightly liveable. Somewhere in his gut he felt that he was about to get visitors he needed to hurry.

* * *

Eddy had grown up in an orphanage he never played with the other children instead finding that his passion was in deceit and money. Eddy left the orphanage at the age of eight and grew up learning from random hustlers until he perfected the art of skillfully taking what wasn't his, be it through a shell game con or straight from the victim's pocket. Eddy had a slight height disorder and learned to use the little kid thing to his advantage stealing and conning to his hearts content without fear of punishment. Then one day when he was fourteen the cops came for Eddy. After leading them on an elaborate chase and losing them by faking his own demise the littlest conman did what any smart criminal would do in his position, he disappeared.

* * *

Now as eddy walked down the sidewalk he spotted what looked like a kid sized whino wandering his way. He stopped and looked around to see if anyone else was around. "Excuse me good sir." He cried out.

The hobo looked up (or rather down) and came face to face with the shortest preteen he'd ever seen. Oh Eddward could tell that he was older than he looked it was a world weary air that he gave off but something else as well. Something he couldn't yet describe, so he decided to play along. "Why hello there little boy how are you tonight?"

Eddy mentally rubbed his hands together in fiendish delight. "Well you see mister I'm lost. I can't find my mommy." Eddy said tearing up. "Please hold me." He screamed leaping to hug the vagrant.

Eddy stopped midair by the vagabond's hand and brought back down to earth only to see the look on the sock hatted kids face. "Firstly this is too nice a neighborhood for a child of your apparent age to be out. Secondly though you don't look it I know you're older than you let on and thirdly rich kids don't ever hug whinos give up the scam now while you're ahead."

Eddy's face returned to normal as he wiped dirt off of his new bowling shirt (stolen from a department store up the road.) and fixed his gaze on the stranger. "Well I suppose I have to congratulate you most people aren't smart enough ta figure me right away. Judging by your threads I'd guess that you're homeless and it's obvious that you ran away from home. What happened daddy stop tucking you in at night?"

Edd smiled sadly, "Actually he just forgot to lock the basement door."

"Huh?"

Edd raised his shirt to reveal scars and welts. Even after two years of healing the bruises were still visible at least they were in his mind. "I made a B on my report card so he took me to the basement. He came at me and I slit his throat. Been on the run ever since. You?"

"Ripped a couple families off then faked my own death and ran from the cops."

"Well it would appear that we're in the same boat so for tonight at least let's bunk down together."

"Hey dude let's get one thing straight I ain't like that."

"I never implied that you were but this is a nice neighborhood and without my intelligence I doubt you'll last very long in this town. For instance I bet that you have no idea were you'll sleep tonight."

"Sure I do I'll just bunk down in a shelter."

"We're nearly ten miles from the nearest one."

"Dog house?"

"And risk a dog finding you?"

"Okay smart guy what's your brilliant plan."

Eddward jabbed his finger at the house beside them.

"Pfft like that's such a great idea I coulda come up with that."

"But you didn't." Edd retorted as he walked up the path to the porch. "Are we in agreement?"

Eddy grunted in frustration "Yeah okay, you got yourself a deal."

Edd and Eddy both crept in to the house after nudging open the creaky old door. They were walking towards the stairs when all of a sudden the lights sprang to life. Eddy squeaked slightly at the intrusion of illumination, whilst Eddward merely set his satchel of jars on the ground. A thumping was heard from the stairs and the two boys watched curiously as a third housemate appeared right before their eyes.

This new boy smiled vacantly as he put his arms out to his sides before wrapping the two into a tight bear hug and yelling "It's so good to be home huh guys."

"Do we know you tall annoying and stupid." Eddy yelled

"Nope. But I can fix that my names Ed and I am pleased to meet you new friends."

"Greetings Ed I am Eddward spelled with two d's and this is... beg pardon but I don't believe I actually know your name."

"It's Eddy. Now put me down lumpy!" Eddy screamed as he wriggled and writhed.

"Okay dokey." Ed agreed as he dropped the two resulting in them getting tangled in a heap on the ground.

As Eddward and Eddy stood up they followed Ed who seemed to be moving about the house. All the while they looked left and right as they stared in wonderment at the houses dusty belongings. The house was filled with odd and grim baubles and white sheet covered furniture. The previous owner had obviously been either an eccentric billionaire or a psychotic mass murderer.

"There's plenty of rooms here guys just pick whichever one you wanna stay in and tell me. I'll have a bed moved in there in a jiffy. Oh and just so you know this house is filled with secret passages in the walls so if you ever need to hide in a hurry just head to one of the entrances."

"Intriguing and how did you perchanse come upon this knowledge?"

"Silly double D I read the blue print in the basement." Ed smiled

Eddward frowned at Ed "It's a bit early to be giving me a nickname isn't it? Although I like the sound of that one. Double D. It's got kind of a ring to it."

Eddy got in front of the two and stopped them "Look I don't mean to be rude here but it's the middle of the school year how are we all going to be able to get away with living in this house without being arrested for truancy or busted for not having any adults living here?"

"Very simple, Eddy was it? I'm quite skilled at forgery among other things. We'll simply build ourselves three lives, get into school, buy up this property, and turn over a new leaf."

"AGREED." Ed yelled throwing his hand between the three.

"Indeed." Double D nodded.

They both turned to stare at Eddy as he slowly contemplated what was being offered. "Alright I'm in."

* * *

I'll update soon don't you worry boys and girls. Sikeokilla out.

Your friend in confidence  
The sikeokilla  
EWC


	2. Things can't get much worse

I the sikeokilla personally apologize for the atrocity of putting this story off for so long. I will make it up to you by making sure that Gir never visits your house on my orders.

Two days later...

"DOUBLE D!" Eddy's cry rang through the halls of the mansion nearly making Eddward drop the vial of chemicals he was handling. He looked over at the clock on the desk. "Huh seven A.M. already time really flies when one is trying to create advanced intelligence in ants. COMING EDDY!"

Eddward grabbed his backpack and headed for the false panel concealing his rooms entrance. He came out in the foyer of the mansion. He checked himself over. He'd found new clothes just the night before a black t-shirt with the lettering "Z?" on the front, over-sized pants held in place by a tightly drawn leather belt, a floppy black sock cap with thin white thread around the rim, and a lab coat that reached his ankles.

During his search he'd also discovered a diary that explained the home's past and the history of it's late owner Dr. Vlagdenrhau. The not so good doctor had commissioned the house to hide those he experimented with and those he tortured and killed. Double D had paid for the house with an online bank account transfer. He'd stolen obscene amounts of money from some American singer and made sure to plant enough evidence to make it look like it had been perpetrated by one Trevor Rex a hacker from California with a history of online theft. He paid for the house and then went to a local bazaar and bought something to stock their cabinets.

"Double D how come we gotta eat these crappy RMEs if we have enough dough to buy mcdonalds?"

"Firstly Eddy it's MRE as in meal ready to eat, secondly we don't have THAT much money, and thirdly we need to stretch this money as thin as we can. This house should have cost a fortune but due to the atrocities it housed we got it for a solid two hundred and five thousand dollars. Quite the catch in today's market but utilities will cost us quite enough to make up for it if we aren't wise with energy consumption. Though I am working on a self sufficient energy source. Anyhow I got those MREs for a dime apiece."

Eddy grunted "Yeah that's cause they taste lousy and they're cold too."

Eddward glared at him "It wouldn't be cold if you'd bothered to use the heater that comes with it. Small green pouch remember seeing it? Besides they're so cheap that I only had to spend a hundred dollars to get us a few months worth and the guy who sold them has even more. I think he smuggled them out of some army warehouse besides they keep longer than anything I know of."

"I like buttered toast double d!"Ed screamed from the top of the stairway.

Ed was still sporting his customary green trench coat and red and white striped t-shirt. His pants were tight around his waste but sagged into creases near his ankles. His ragged tennis shoes had been replaced at the good will store and he now sported a pair of black combat boots. They had been able to get six pairs for sixty dollars so that even if they managed to blow through their current pair they'd have a backup.

Eddy's boot tapped the ground in impatience "Come on Lumpy we gotta get to the school so we can start the first day of the rest of our lives."

The three boys set about packing their backpacks and practicing their backstory together.

* * *

Meanwhile at the bus stop...

* * *

Marie was bored. Not even at school yet and already the cul-de-sac kids were getting on her nerves. "Kevin I swear to god if you say one more indecent word about Johnen Vasquez's works, I'm just about gonna fucking lose it."

The boy she was arguing with was the only one who lived on the same street as the three Kanker houses that would dare stand up to any of them in conversation. All of the other kids were standing on the far side of the bus stop trying to ignore the loud mouthed motor head and the dysfunctional sisters.

Kevin had a full head of flaming orange hair and wore a wife beater with oil stains on it. "Look all I'm saying is that if an alien has that amount of technology he should at least be able to build a better space craft than that purple hunk of junk."

Marie was about to tear into him when a sudden movement in the old Mansion across the street caught her eye. It wasn't just her eye that was riveted in that direction either. Jimmy, Johnny, Rolf, Nazz, Kevin, May, and even Lee were all looking at the old place like it might spontaneously spew lava.

Noone knew much about the old place except that lots of people had died there. Everyone on the cul-de-sac just called it the old Doe place. It was said to be haunted by no less than one-hundred and seven ghosts. And right now the front door was making a creeking noise. Nobody could see if anyone came out however due to the seven foot high lawn. The grass russled and everyone who stood waiting for the bus tensed. The grass parted and two high pitched shreaks lept from the small crowd, one for Nazz and one from Jimmy. It was only upon inspection of three boys that came strolling out that everyone calmed down.

Kevin snorted at the new kids. There was the small angry looking one with the shifty eyes, then there was the ultra nerd with the odd hat, and finally bringing up the rear was tall dumb and smelly. Even from across the street Ed smelled bad. The boys walked up to the bus stop and stood without saying a word to anyone. Most everyone decided that looking at them might be bad luck and looked away. The only exceptions were the Kanker sisters.

Now I say sisters but that's not entirely accurate. See the girls all had the same mother but truth be told their fathers were rarely ever brought into the picture. Their mom was a wild-child back in the day and ended up getting knocked up at the age of fifteen nine months later Lee was born. The father was sued for every penny over sexual assault of a minor.

Then we move on to her second entanglement. At the age of eighteen she tied the knot with a comic store owner she thought was kinda cute. She had Marie and then suddenly decided that he wasn't all that cute. They were split up a couple months later and she got half of everything and he got child support checks for the rest of his life.

Now the last marriage is the one that really seemed to shock her into behaving. See she got married at the age of twenty to a guy who was in a band. And eventually she squeezed out her third bundle of joy. Problem was that he was abusing her and threatening her kids. Breaking up with him was easy enough, taking him for everything he had was a given, but she never seemed the same after that.

She settled down in the burbs and worked long hours at a large corporate office building. Eventually she became the CEO unfortunately this left little time for her daughters. The three siblings often got into tussles with each other so to cut down on their squabbling she bought up two extra houses and kept each girl in a separate one. She visits each household once a week to see her daughters.

Lee had a head full of bright orange curls she wore trendy clothes and loved the finer things in life, her favorite music is pop rock. Marie had a head of naturally blue hair that fell over one of her eyes in a comb-over, unlike her sister she prided herself on being low maintenance and listens to alternative rock of all sorts. The youngest girl was not the most intelligent girl, neither high or low maintenance she tended to be the bridge between her two sisters. Though May will normally listen to anything coming from the speaker her favorite music where kid songs, though she'd never admit it to her sisters.

Marie tapped the sock hatted one on the shoulder and he responded by turning to face her. "You're in my spot skinny. Move it." She hissed.

Edd simply nodded his head and tentatively stepped aside to allow the young lady to take her spot back. Marie was not satisfied with this however and proceeded to shove the boy towards the rest of the kids. He tripped over a raised cement crack edge and toppled onto the kids pinning them under his small from. After the surprise of being tackled by the new kid wore off they had no trouble in heaving him off of themselves and each giving him a stern lecture and a warning.

'Great I haven't even learned their names and I'm already in hot water with all of the kids in the neighborhood there's no way things can get any worse.' Double dee thought to himself as the bus rumbled up and hissed to a halt.


	3. Unusual Circumstances

Hello denizens and welcome to the Discreet Funeral Morgue. I, your host would like to welcome you back to the Morgue. Whether this is a temporary visit or a permanent one I can assure you that you will all eventually check into you're own little refrigerated metal box but never fear... we have cable. When last we left the Eds they had just entered the bus. Now we shall see how they fare in their new community.

* * *

Chapter 3: First day.

* * *

"Well Eddy the firewall on the school files was a joke." Double d said with a grin. "I'm in and I've got a hold of all of the personal records of most of the students."

Eddy was pacing behind the brainy ed wringing his hands. "Give it to me straight Eddward. What are we looking at?"

"Ham and cheese is the way to please guys." Ed yelled before being shushed by the school librarian.

"Well I'll just go over the big names and the kids who live on our cul-de-sac. First up there's Kevin. He's at the top of the heap. Quarterback of the football team, most likely to succeed, and he's a hell of a mechanic. Says here that he leads the district in competitive shop competitions."

Eddy did a double take. "That's a real thing?"

"Apparently. Anyhow up next is Nazz, the head cheerleader. She's dated most of the boys in the school and has a solid C- average."

"It says she dated lots of guys in her file?"

"It's stated in factual note. Let's move on to Jimmy. Good grades so far. Says that he has a little trouble fitting in with the boys due to his fashionista personality. That just leaves Johnny and Plank. Johnny has a B average and an overactive imagination coupled with a submissive attitude. Plank makes straight A's and has a quiet but domineering personality."

"Wait what about the other three."

Double D shook his head at Eddy. "The digital file just said to see the hard copy. But I don't really need to see the file. I asked around and got the scoop on them. They're all sisters. The read head is the leader of the group, she's not incredibly bright but that's not to say that she's stupid. She's incredibly loud and very good at getting people to do what she wants. Then there's the youngest, a dim bulb she may be but she's pretty charismatic. In fact I've been told that the one time she left town without her sisters the two got into a huge fight."

"And the last girl?"

"She was actually pretty difficult to dig information up on. Nobody wanted to talk so I had to twist some arms and Jackson Drife is going to have a cast on his leg the next time you see him..."

"All this with an hour to spare until the buses come."

Ed suddenly frowned, "Wait a minute aren't we supposed to be in class guys."

Eddy glared "Lumpy be quiet."

Edd rolled his eyes, "Yes Ed Gym was a little less important than this. Anyway Jackson described her as a 'Blue Haired Demon'. Apparently she's the most cunning of the three and the most violent. There are rumors that she's started a gang of her own and that she's killed before. He also happened to mention that she and May have been known to hang out at the city dump."

Eddy squinted at the brainy ed in confusion "Why would you ask where they hang out?"

Double D spins to look at Eddy. "It's very simple Eddy. The kanker sisters are the three most powerful albeit through notoriety. If we observe them perhaps we can find some way to make the cul-de-sac kids respect us."

Eddy nodded his head listening to this spiel "Do you have a backup plan."

"If all else fails we can resort to mastering the art of Savate."

"What the hell does painting have to do with respect."

"Eddy Savate is an old french word used to describe a style of street fighting developed by a local gang in 1874 Paris. They were known as Les Apaches, and they were highly feared thieves."

"So we steal everyone's money?"

Double D sighed "No Eddy we use the techniques to strike fear into the populace thus awarding ourselves the same notoriety that the Kanker sisters enjoy. I'm hoping it won't come to that."

Ed suddenly sprang onto the table in front of the two "Because violence isn't the answer?"

"Because the Kankers may not appreciate competition."

* * *

1 Hour Later in the Junk Yard...

* * *

"What are they doing now guys?"

Eddy rolled his eyes and gave an exasperated reply, "Ed if you ask one more time I'm pushing you off the pile."

"I DON'T HAVE THE SNIPER RIFLE!"

Eddward shushed them, "Both of you need to be quiet." He jammed the last wire into his makeshift listening device.

"How the hell are we going to get it over there sock head?"

Double D didn't reply verbally instead he pulled a 12" frame out of his jacket he gave it a flick and the frame snapped to become a three foot long rifle. Double D muzzle-loaded the bug and shoved a small pressurized tube into the back end he pulled it into his shoulder and steadied for his shot. A second later the gun issued a noise similar to those made by air pressure run nail guns and the bug landed in the sand near the rusted el camino the girls were leaning against.

"And that Eddy is how it's done." Double D said collapsing the frame back to it's original size and stuffing it into the hidden pocket in the inside of the lab coat. He fiddled with a small radio like device and a whistling sound became a conversation.

"...can't believe she said that about me."

Double d pulled out a pad of paper and a pen and began scribbling quickly.

"Marie, I'm sure Lee didn't mean it the way it sounded."

"She sure as shit did."

"Calm down let's talk about something else."

"Alright how about those freaks who showed up at the bus stop this morning?"

"The big one was sort of cute."

The blue haired girl turned to her sister and gave her a slack jawed stare.

"What? He was."

"The short one was pretty loud...reminds me of Lee."

"Don't talk about Lee it'll only upset you. We still haven't talked about the scrawny one."

There was a pause. "I'd rather not talk about him."

"Oh my god is the blue haired demon scared of a skinny little pencil pusher?" the blondes voice is heard chortling.

"I'm not scared of anyone. And I'm definitely not scared of that scrawny little thing. Can you believe he stood in my spot. I didn't see him in gym did you? Those boys are bad news."

"Why are you acting like this?"

"Nothing. Let's go."

The girls started walking towards the entrance...right past where the boys trash pile was.

As they lay on top of the pile Eddy hissed "I blame you for this Double Dweeb."

"Don't call me names shorty."

"Don't call me short."

"Sorry shrimp."

Eddy growled and punched double d sending him sliding off of the trash pile to fall into an old refrigerator. Which promptly slammed it's door on him. The girls jumped at the noise.

"What the heck was that Marie?" The blonde screamed

"May please. It's hell. What the HELL was that. And we're about to find out." Marie stormed over to the refrigerator and yanked open the front door. Only to find a bundle of clothes. " It's nothin May just someones old laundry."

"Why don't we take it Marie it'll make great material." the blonde giggled as she grabbed hold of the sleeves and pant leg of double d's crumpled form.

"I told you not to mention that ever again." Marie snarled.

"Oh come on who'd have thought that everyone's worst nightmare liked to make costumes."

"It's called cosplaying and it's never being discussed again. Got it?"

"Alright alright geez." She grunted. "Hey Marie a little help?"

"You're such a weakling May." SHe said grabbing the pile of clothes with double d inside and slinging them over her shoulder with one hand. "See? Nothin to it, now let's go to my house."

"Okee dokee."

As the girls disappeared Eddy sprinted down the mountain of garbage. "Oh crap oh crap oh crap. I told him that baggy clothes were a bad idea."

"I like the big pretzels Eddy."

* * *

Reviews requests? shoot.


	4. Chapter 4

Long time since update. Explanation: Internet problems and lots of them. Good morning class. What oh what shall I educate your idle minds on today? I know let's learn a little more about the characters on which the story is focused and what could be better for plot development than turmoil brought on by confusion and dismay? Heh heh heh. I love this job.

* * *

Chapter 4: Confusion and Dismay (appropriately titled, no?)

* * *

The girls walked into Marie's house passing the den filled with empty alcohol containers and equally barren pizza boxes. They stopped just short of the kitchen which currently housed a couple of stolen pigs and a mountain of dirty dishes. They chose instead to climb the stairs on the right side of the hallway making a right at the top of the stairs and continued past a bathroom that looked like it belonged to a truck stop and a hall closet that creaked ominously as they passed it. They arrived at Marie's room door and the blue haired girl unlocked the two padlocks and swung the door wide for her sister.

Marie's room (unlike the rest of the house) was spotless and well-lit. She had a bean bag chair set in the corner and a hammock in the corner farthest from the door. A hammock swing away from the hammock there lay a shelf filled with all sorts of books from the academic to the psychological horror to comic books in mylar bags, with the odd romance novel here and there. Tacked up above the hammock was a poster of "The Alchemists of Rock". Beside the wicker doored closet sat a flat desk with several half-finished drawings lying under a sparse layer of art supplies and finished works tacked up above it with nails. She plopped down the bundle of clothes in the closet with a resounding 'whump'.

May looked around the room. "You know if you took care of the rest of the house as well as you take care of this room it wouldn't look so terrible."

Marie sighed "Yeah but then I'd have to cancel my thrice weekly party."

"Where did the pigs come from?"

"At some point I just leave them to their fun and don't ask any questions. I only really attend one party a week and I don't drink anything but soda that I labeled to look like beer with me can label printer."

As May was preparing to retort a gasp was heard from the bundle of clothes in the closet. As the girls watched the bundle leapt up and most of the clothes fell away to reveal a scrawny lad in a lab coat. "EUREKA!" he screeched whipping out a pen and beginning to scribble on a bare piece of the nearby wall. "It's all so simple now the solution lies within the nuclear theories of doctor Scliver. Simply put 6 multiplied by the principle amount of the solution to the equation the answer is not as I had previously estimated sixty-four but rather fifty-nine. This would explain the advanced growth in size rather than brain function. Thus applying from a different location and utilizing a different synthesis. Perhaps Isotope-275 rather than Isotope-562. Thus brain advancement is initiated without the growth of the mind breaking through the exoskeleton of the skull."

As the lad finished his scribblings Marie screamed "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE!?"

The sock hatted boy turned to examine the noise. "Well I don't know where here is... but to answer your question I'm working on my newest project. It's a..." he trailed off looking around "seriously where am I?"

Marie's face practically glowed a deep crimson color. "You're in my FUCKING ROOM!"

The boy fixed her with an appraising gaze upon his completion of assessing her room. "you know it's quite obvious to me that despite your rough and tough it attitude that you have an extremely high IQ. If I were to guess I'd say that you are one of the biggest closet cases of intelligence that I've ever seen. I can't imagine why such a lovely young genius like you would pretend to be naught but dim and violent."

Marie's eyes grew to the size of saucers but she quickly righted her mistake and fixed the boy with a scowl before growling at him "I'm the blue haired demon of peach creek. I have a drove of party happy gangsters at my beck and call. And I can tell you the make and model of just about any car I come across along with how to fix it's many problems. You tell me do I seem like the type of girl who would let someone hit on her and live?"

"Bold words for a simple threat. Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?" He said with a smirk.

Marie snarled and simultaneously grabbed the collar of his shirt and cocked back her fist. "Are you accusing me of something?"

"I'm merely stating a fact." He craned his neck around to stare behind her at the can label maker. "How many people know that you built that out of old scraps from the junkyard?"

Marie froze as a dear in the headlights would. "How did you..."

"Do you think that your attempt to hide your obvious intelligence as well as your creative talent is a by-product of your belief that people would be intimidated by your mental prowess?"

"I...I..."

He freed himself from her hands. "You know if you ever wish to talk about anything I have a couch and a practical knowledge of the psychological workings of a human mind. Of course you don't need to come if you don't want to but I have a rather empty appointment book."

The room door burst open and a gangly boy with a stupid smile on his face burst through the door with a yellow lump on his back. "We are three once more." he yelled in delight.

"Come on sock head we're bustin' ya out."

The sock hat wearing youngster was whipped out of the room by his hand. "It was a delight seeing you again Marie." He yelled whilst bouncing down the stairs pulled along by the gangly boy.

May cocked her eye at Marie "That was wierd. What do you think it was al about?"

Marie narrowed her eyes "I have a better question. How did he know my name?"

* * *

Wait patiently it'll get better...hopefully.


	5. Notice of hiatus

The flouresent bulbs flicker on to reveal a morbidly obese man in a blood stained muscle shirt bursting at the seams.

"Please I'm sorry it wasn't my fault."

A white faced boy with neat white blonde hair in a black hoodie strode into the light holding a wooden baseball bat riddled with teeth and bone fragments. "Did I ask who's fault it was you blithering idiot? No let me stop you from answering that question as it's rhetorical. Now where were we? The knees? Or perhaps the eyes? Look up real quick."

A hand appears from the darkness and grabs hold of the hooded boys shoulder. "Now now Edward there's no reason to get violent. You should have made sure that your alarm was set to go off." Following these words a tanned face emerges beneath a black suit with a red tie down the middle and a golden blond hair slicked back over the boy's scalp.

"Jack if we're going to blame anyone we should blame Gir...or Cody."

"HEY!" A metal drawer slid out and a slab fell into the light. On the slab lay a little robot softly snoring in a green dog outfit with the head thrown off and a boy with wild golden blonde hair wearing a shredded kneed pair of pants and a plain black t-shirt. "I will not be blamed for something that was clearly my fault." He stares down at the sleeping robot. "Gir wake up."

"Oo and while we're at it why don't we wake you know who?" the tan boy cried.

The pale boy in the black hoodie sighed "Guys! We've got a show to do. Remember?"

The wild haired boy nodded "Oh yeah we needed to do that. The thing right?"

A black vapor rose into the air over the three conversing teens whereas they looked to the source. The little robot was mashing soap and wasabi into a now burning waffle set into the open cavity of a man's stomach which housed a fire nestlled into the spine.

"Damnit Gir." the tan boy groaned.

The hooded boy just rolled his eyes "Let's just start the story already."

"Oo oo weren't we at the part where the boys had rushed out of Marie's house?"

"Very good Cody it appears that your head is of more use housing your brain than holding flowers... Jack you owe me ten bucks."

"Well let's tell the folks the bad news. We're discontinuing this story to do some re-writing. It will come back but for now it's on hiatus. It'll be a better representation in it's return."

"Yeah so be good and remember to smile smile smile." The fat man's mouth was wrenched open and a clamp is put on one of his teeth. Fade to black.


End file.
